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Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Happy Birthday...

Happy 54th Birthday!
Sorry! For being so honest about it. I know you'll hate it but then let me assure you by saying this-
No! You don't look like a 54 year old!!! Not at least to me. You are still the one I met long long ago. Slim...pretty...always smiling... caring... loving...tender & petite! Someone who always smelt so refreshing. Someone I knew was the best and truely unmatched. You're still the one & you're still the same. You will always be so.
But you know what?
I don't have a gift for you today.
Not that because I am broke :(...
not that I couldn't find the exact pair of stilletoes you wanted...
not that I couldn't find your favourite blue chiffon saree...
but because I haven't been doing so for the last ten years....I still have the card which I gave you on this very day ten years back. You saw the card, but didn't read it though. I don't blame you. There's no reason for me to be angry . I knew it. But you sure liked what you saw...right? So that card still remains inside my closet... I had a look today early in the morning.... smiled at myself... wished you and the card back went to its secure zone again, only to be opened this very day the next year.
Just would like to tell you that I love you lots and you'll be mine forever & for always. And I know you will be by my side in my darkest hours... you will be my strength... you pacify me when I am tired and you'll be there to remind me always that this is not the end of the road...
And..... No! I don't miss you at all.
For me you still exist. Your presence is in me. Its you who made me what I am today.

Happy 54th Birthday Maa!

The incorrigible inference & womanly instincts!

I met Simi after what seemed ages. I faintly recall seeing her & Gaurav two years ago right after they got married on one cold December evening near Gauhati Commerce College. Gaurav got down to buy fags & so was Nirav's mission. I have seen Nirav & his bunch of lads buying fags from this particular shop for the last few years. So this guy who owns the shop knows all about his loyal customers - by their names... families... address... & he is a messenger to these guys too at times...
But then here I was talking about Simi in the first place.
It was Janti's birthday and the whole gang got together after a long time. I was happy to see Simi. She looked the same like the last time I saw her infront of that ciggy shop near Gauhati Commerce College. We exchanged pleasantries and started off with the usual female talks... the hubby cribs... the ongoing world-cup & the fight for the TV remote and what not!
Simi & Gaurav stays quite nearby to ours. So naturally both of us were vying to make that grand statement "PLEASE DO DROP IN AT OUR PLACE SOMETIME"!
It was Simi who did away with that statement & I said OK we should definitely make it sometime. One thing led to other & we got on to exchanging cell numbers... She told me hers & I stored it. To make things easy for her I called her number and within a minute or so the screen of her cell phone flashed with my name!
MY NAME? I was suddenly filled with guilt! I thought how mean I was all this time...how rude of me to have not stored her phone number… inspite of being in the same circle... I delved... I rummaged... and yet I could find no answer to this hostility of my attitude I felt I had....
I looked to Simi and for a fraction of a moment I felt something was terribly wrong. Simi's expression was joyous & blissful like "never before"! A thousand and one thoughts ran across my mind but I could never exactly assimilate why was she smiling more than she should have had and why her face suddenly showed as if a heavy saddle was off her shoulders....
I knew I would not be able to make the guess nor was I in a mood to play a James Bond! So without wasting much time I gave her a questioning look....
All I could hear was Simi telling me over and over again "Oh! so its you.... its only you... Gosh! Its only you....." Her words seemed to reverberate!
I smiled back feeling silly and slightly awkward too! I knew where the hitch was! And I wondered how could she live with a burden so insignificant and yet as annoying as seeing a woman’s name on her hubby’s cell phone. And she didn’t dare to actually sort out with Gaurav about it!
…. She looked at me trying to calm her nerves and said, “…. Until now I had some outrageous ideas….how terribly stupid on my part…..”
The cell phone was Gaurav’s before it became hers. So Gaurav had my number stored too – my number was just a sort of S.O.S –“… just in case….he had to leave a message for Nirav…”
As Simi & Gaurav were about to leave I wish her “Good-Night” and believe me… she actually would sleep proper & good from now on!