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Monday, December 18, 2006

The count down for the new year's has already begun. Friends & folks have already chalked out elaborate plans about New Year's Eve. Ask me that and hopnestly I haven't really thought about it as yet. I just dont know what I want to - I am in a state of confusion - should I say Bye-Bye to a year which has been a heady coktail of adventure, mishaps, fun and rewards or do I welcome yet another set of another 12 months or 52 weeks or 365&1/4th day with a lousy hangover?!

I've been on the move since 8th of Dec.

One day I was conducting the leadership meet in the Brahmaputra Jungle Resort & a few hours later I find myself waking up in a 5 star hotel in Mumbai... and just when I got used to the late nights like a typical Mumbai-ite (not to forget the lingo too!).... I found myself in yet another palce where the town shuts down by four in the evening! I was in Kohima!!!

I took out my dairy and looked at the Indian Map and within twenty four hours I was from the west coast to the north easten side of the country! Wheras Mumbai I slept with the AC on ; Kohima was too cold to be bear!!!!

Even now the phone buzzed - "New Year Eve Plans Ki??"

Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooossssssssssssssssssssssssh!!!!!!!!

All I wanna do is sleep in my own damn room!

For God's sake don't ask me out on a date!

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

My itchy lettle feet!

The best part about my job is that it lets me go to places, which I would have never even remotely thought about traveling otherwise. These travels have been either an hour’s drive from my domicile or at other times have been one unending and meandering expedition. Whatever be the roads like or whatever be season, one thing which has left me perplexed is that every place has it own beauty – it’s just another matter that people don’t observe or realize.

Travels have been ample. Some have been adventurous, some dull; and some left me gripping and mad. In three months I have traveled more than I had in the thirty years of my existence! They say business and pleasure do not mix. And sure it doesn’t. But then to look the other way round if I keep my work just to work and try to enjoy the rest of whatever little time I get; it sure becomes a travel so much like me – a freebee… a soul with itchy feet!

Kolkata was one classic example of a roller- coaster ride.
My boss called me one morning and asked me to get my bags packed and check with our travel agent for the earliest possible flight. Within the next twenty-four hours I was airborne. We touched down exactly forty-five minutes later and I was in Kolkata after nearly a decade. As I passed the streets everything had changed. The picture of Kolkata I had in my mind was certainly not the one I was seeing. Well off course for one factor that remains constant – the traffic snarls – that is perhaps one antagonizing phase of this colossal metro.

The driver took a long time to locate the 9 Shakespeare Sarani. As we waited in one long jam the driver popped out his head and asked a passer by in the local dialect where exactly was the 9 Shakespeare Sarani. The passer by looked at me and asked “Aap ko Brook House jana hai?” (Do you want to go to Brook House?) & I affirmed. He explained the driver something. The driver nodded his head and looked at me and said, “Madam, aap ne pehle kyun nahin kaha aapko Hindustan Lever office jana hia”?! (Madam why didn’t you tell me before that you want to go to the Hindustan Lever office?)

I felt like an idiot for reasons I may perhaps never comprehend! But nevertheless!

I reached 9 Shakespeare Sarani and almost immediately I was in the most posh, stylish & sleek office. This is the second office I’ve even seen so very chic. One was the Hughes office in New Delhi. I went there when I was doing my apprenticeship during my mass communication days – a story I will tell some other rainy day! The whole day went by and I didn’t even realize that it was time to call it a day. I was to stay in Camac Street; the hotel booked by the travel desk guys of the Kolkata office. It’s just a five-minute walk from the office. I reached the hotel and was dog-tired. My limbs I knew wanted to relax. I was not here to relax and I had only fifteen minutes in hand to freshen up and get going for the mega programme. Minto Park is again a ten-minute walk from my hotel and I trotted down the aisle rapidly. The awards function was a long one and I excused myself by nine. Ma’am (my boss) understood that I need to unwind and she let me go with a reminder that I should be back at 9 Shakespeare Sarani sharp ten the next day.

The next day I woke up and found a slight drizzle. I had not carried an umbrella. I waited in the lobby of my hotel for a few minutes but there was no respite and the minutes were passing by. I thought of taking a cab but that would not settle my state of affairs as the entire passage is a one-way route and the five-minute would become a nerve wrecking half an hour! So I decided to walk down no matter if I got faintly drenched.

By the time I walked out of office the drizzle was a downpour now. I wanted to rush back to the hotel but the aroma of the kebabs and rolls lured me to stop by in of the take away counters. I looked at the menu and ordered one double egg, chicken and cheese roll. This was sure indulgence but then this is again something I am up-to everyday.

I was soaking wet by the time I arrived the hotel. I asked the receptionist to get the bills ready, as I would be out of the place early next day. I waited for an hour or so but the bills did not arrive. I called up the reception and I was informed that I could settle it the next morning before leaving. No! I insisted that I settle my accounts now, as I don’t like last minute snags. But I was moderately pacified that I could settle the bills the next day.

I woke up much before the bellboy came (he had assured that he would give me a wake-up call at six thirty) to knock my door with the bed tea. I asked him to get my bills while in the mean time I freshened up and got ready. The bills came and I handed out my credit card.

The adventure began from here!

Well let me take back to that day again when my Boss called and asked me to fly to Kolkat. I was dead broke, my bank account showed meager 1500/- cash! I had no time to ponder about by finances. I had to travel. The tickets were no issue as they were booked on credit; I did a wise thing by calling the hotel where I was to stay and confirmed the fact that the hotel accepted credit card. So this made the 1500/- cash quite a big amount.

As I handed the credit card, the bellboy said that they would not accept credit card and I need to pay cash. My irritation, which otherwise remains passive amplified! I took the credit card and hurried towards the elevator. I wanted to speak to the manager. The elevator was out of order. I walked down three floors and as I reached the last ten stairs I was horrified to see the entire reception counter submerged! The water went knee deep and the people on the ground floor rooms had been shifted elsewhere. There was no electricity either. I had to report at the airport by 9.00 a.m and it was past seven thirty now. The nearest ATM was in Minto Park but there the water reached up till the waist. I was advised not to go. Time was running out and I decided to cancel my flight. That was the only thing I could do lest I miss my flight and burn some cash for not canceling the tickets too. But then how do I call! My mobile was not working; there was no electricity; the telephones went dead and I could not move out either. The bellboy I guess could feel the dilemma I was in and he handed me his cell phone. He said he would charge five bucks per call – outgoing or incoming and I agreed blindly to this deal! Besides the rickety cell phone with the most astounding ring tones I ever heard there was no other way I could communicate. I called home; boss (well in this order only) and airlines office to cancel my flight. And in the mean time the corridor on the first floor was turned into a reception counter. The printer was not squealing; rather every work was being done manually. Many got stranded. Some acted smart and checked out but they could never make it to the station or the airport and when they came back even the rooms were occupied! The plight of everyone was dismal. Good that I had not checked out. I knew I had the room to spend the night; yet I was tensed, as I didn’t know how to make my payments in cash! The dilemma still persisted. I went back to my room and I actually I had done a good thing by saving a bucket of water! I don’t know why I did! But I knew this is the only bucket of water I had to use for the next twenty-four hours! Someone knocked my door and it was just another bellboy who came to take order for lunch. Well! Since the kitchen was almost under water the lunch was the basic rice, dal and veggies. I tried to get some sleep but nothing could make my eyes or my mind rest. I went back to the first floor; peeped through the window. The level of water had not gone down nor the rains stopped. The Manager did not seem busy and we started chatting. In the due course I told the manger that in no way I could make cash payment until and unless I swam to the ATM counter at Minto Park! The manager devised one option and since there was nothing else I could do I agreed to his suggestion. He said that if I trusted him with my credit card he could swipe it elsewhere on his way back home and return it to me the next morning. Well! I know it’s not healthy to trust strangers you started speaking just ten minutes ago with your credit card but then what the heck!

I went back to my room, got my card and handed it to the Manager. It was late evening and almost everyone had gathered in the corridor and it seemed like we were one excursion team! Candles were lit everywhere. Every room was sanctioned two candles but I smuggled four. I cannot sleep when the room is pitch dark; I hoped the four would last me as long as I didn’t fell fast asleep. Dinner was no better. And I made it early to bed for I expected the worse for the next morning.

The next morning the knock on my door was my wake up call. I opened the door and saw one of the bellboys (who had given me his cell phone) with tea and my credit card and the settled bills. Suddenly everything seemed to fall in places. The rains hadn’t stopped, but the level of water had subsided. I knew I had to walk on the mud-spattered and grimy water hence taking a shower was out of question. Still in my shorts and tee and slippers I swaggered towards the main road and I negotiated with a cab driver to go to the airport. The driver asked me what time the flight was and I replied I didn’t have a ticket! I picked my bags and hopped in the cab. It took me around forty-five minutes to reach the airport. I checked the entire airline counters and booked the earliest flight back to Guwahati. As I handed my credit card I prayed and hope in the back of my mind nothing would go wrong and boy! It didn’t! I walked in though the security, checked in and as I looked at my watch I still had an hour at my disposal. I ordered for a cup of coffee and as I was waiting I for the coffee to arrive I realized that I was still tee/shorts & sandals clad! My baggage had already been checked; marked and sealed and there was nothing I could do but board the flight without trying to look too conscious!

As I took my seat and looked up The Telegraph it read that Kolkata witnessed heaviest downpour since 1971! I didn’t really want to read that news. I was trapped for twenty-four hours in hotel with my life thrown out of gear.

As the airplane ascended I reclined and closed my eyes and got calculating about my next training session scheduled to be in Nagaland within the next two days….

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

The Great Indian Snack!

I am not a foodie at all. Rather I am not a good eater. There are many things I don’t eat or I don’t like than the ones I love to gorge! I don’t live to eat but I eat to live.
The morning rush leaves me with little time to prepare breakfast. The practical readers may suggest that I wake up an hour or half early to prepare breakfast, but waking up early is the toughest in my agenda. I don’t even remember waking up early during the most painstaking examinations (read – science & math & oxomiya!...thanx heavens I didn’t flunk…well that’s altogether a different story & one more reason to blog!)
So preparing the dinner is upto me. I decide what should be eaten for dinner. But almost 90% of the times I am between the devil & the deep sea. I end up asking Nirav the menu & that’s how it goes.
The usual gourmet leaves me disillusioned. But talk about JUNK food!!! And there where my loyalties are!
I can never get tired of the sweet & sour, hot & tangy chutneys served with the samosas! The hotter the better. Infact I’ve been such a brand loyal to this great Indian snack that I’ve got some specific outlets from where I have it. I’ve experimented enough with it & now I know what my taste-buds desires & what are my gastronome delights!
Keeping in mind all the ill effects the samosa has on one’s health, it could never make me pay heed to those! How much Aita would tell me to opt for something more “healthier” , Be it the ones from Guwahati Dairy, or from Dilli Mistan or from Bengali Sweets & Nathu’s…. well, they are just finger licking yummy! The very smell of the deep fried samosa would make me pine for just one bite!
There has been times and instances when this very great Indian snack has left me petrified. It’s because of this very samosa that I’ve had two assaults of food poisoning! The first time I was down ill, I promised myself that I’d never touch the “Wretched” snack again! How angry I had been. But with the antibiotics doing the magic and me getting back in shape, there I was in one of my favourite outlet ready to toss down yet one more! As I was about to gulp I saw Boon standing at the Pan shop and looking at me snidely. He couldn’t imagine even in wildest of his nightmares that after such a ghastly experience I’d get back to where I left!
The second attack was no better! The routine followed – only the time was different. And this time when Boon got the news that I was bed ridden he didn’t even wish me “A QUICK RECOVERY….!!!”
Well that’s been a pretty long time now. Six months, maybe. I don’t like to recall dates that are not pleasant.
But though my devotion still remains with the samosa I’ve not had one for a long time now. I have not done it consciously. Or maybe it’s kinda Passé now. I am not sure about it. Let me try one. Let me see if I get the same feelings and also let me be sure that I am not attacked by another bout of food poisoning again!
But all said & done my loyalties ceases to dither & wither!

The Deepest Fear That's Getting Old!

Finally I realized what it takes to be in an MNC!
Well I was just a usual professional in a Tea Company. I knew my job so well that it was kinda monotony. The adrenaline failed to give me the rush and I guess I was getting to comfy with my space and my ass being glued to my seat!
One thing led to other and one fine day I find myself being called for an interview in one of the world's biggest MNCs! Whhhoaaaa! Sounds too good to be true right? But then it took three rounds of interviews - both personal and telephonic to get me thru! That was quite an ordeal... not that I depised it... but it surely was nerve wrecking!
The biggest fear - stage fright! I dread the very thought of standing up and speaking to an audience.... but the fright waned bit by bit when I was teaching business communication & English in an MBA school .... then came the time when I was asked by the Dean & also the Directors of the Institute to anchor their seminars and orientation programmes...
Somehow I completely forgot about my deepest fear "STAGE FRIGHT"!
And now when I will be working day in and day out in this new company I shall be doing rounds and rounds of talking to an audience and making presentations! And the FEAR is not about giving presentations in front of a large audience here.. but its something else - I cannot let UB down! UB- don't know how he "hand picked" me to join his team and work.. so I cannot let UB down! And to make sure I don't let him down I will give all that it takes to be deligent in my new job.
So what goes around comes around! This might not make sense here but then again - I shall be doing something which would make me have complete blackouts as a kid!
And the best part is I shall get to travel a lot... travelling - now that's like a paid holiday throughout my working hours!.... and well the icing on the cake - well I'll get to use some of the most reknown products for my hair... skin.... and also fragrances!
Now that things are stream-lining ... I guess I should get back to my blogging again!

Monday, August 07, 2006

Not a nightmare

Some dreams are so real it seems scary. Scary because I relate to it.
I see dead people in my dreams. I see them always. Sometimes I am with them and sometimes I am watching them from a distance.
The scariest of them was when I came home the day Poison passed away.
Tales of Poison is again a different story. But for now let me begin where Poison’s life ends.
Poison’s death was unexpected and I was utterly shocked. The whole world froze. My reaction was nothing. I could not express anything. I went to pay my last respects. I was accompanied with a few friends.
Suddenly I was tired. I felt alone all of a sudden. The whole world seemed hostile. I felt there was no one left to call “family. Nevertheless! What’s done cannot be undone.
I stayed there till the body was carried away for the last rites and cremation. I don’t recall who dropped me home or whether I drove home myself. But I found myself in the confines of my room. The next moment I was sound asleep.
It was then something bizarre happened. An experience my feelings says is close to the para-normal.
I was asleep but I felt something dragging me forcefully, it was for real. When I tried to free myself from its clutches I felt as if a very heavy load was placed on me. It was so heavy I could not breathe. I felt chocked and I woke up I was covered with sweat, though it was the month of October and it was marginally cold around that time of the year. I felt so gagged that I couldn’t even speak. I tried to speak but seemed I had lost my voice somewhere.
The cell phone was near me and I gave a missed call to Nirav who was upstairs with Janti & Pranti (our bedroom is more of a cellar).
After giving three missed calls Nirav came down. He was surprised to see me.The colors drained from my face and I was in a state of shock.
At first the guys thought I was upto a prank and hence was giving missed calls. But repeated missed calls for three times told them things were otherwise.
Nirav helped me walk upstairs and when I narrated the incident the guys took it lightly. They said it was because of the emotional turmoil I was going through.

I don’t know.

I don’t have an answer to this. It’s only an assumption and surely does not leave me with a good feeling.

The worst weekend that I ever had!

Work wasn’t too hectic, so surfed the whole day either reading blogs or looking for Egyptian mythologies. Having spent my time leisurely in office which I hardly get to do, we (me & two of my juniors) went window shopping to this newly opened mall. There were road shows, print ads., hoarding – all that and much more to make us decide to go and have a dekho what the mall had to offer.

Except for the cool air conditioned comfort there wasn’t anything else! The hand bags on the shelves were a replica of what I’d get in the road side stalls of Fancy Bazaar. The collections of shoes were limited. Then came the garments section – nothing in particular that would make me shell out a few bucks out of my pockets. Seemed the entire Sarojini collection was being shifted to this mall!

Having browsed thorough we came out of the mall and I treated the girls choco-vanilla ice creams from the Kwality Ice Cream Vendor.

We crossed Barista and I instantly knew one of these days this outlet must be tried… and then compare with its rival Café Coffee Day. Believe me folks! Café Coffee Day has never been a good experience with me! Either they don’t have the edibles I order or they serve forty five minutes late or simply they are running short in the supply of milk or better the music is so damn loud that you cannot have a peaceful time.

I reached home by 6.30 p.m. and got ready for my swimming session. Swimming for me is meditation. The one hour I am in the water I forget everything. I detach myself form the worries, tensions, apprehensions, anxieties. I just have one thing in mind – to reach my target – I set targets everyday – Saturday was set for one kilometer and I swam 842 mts! Not bad though I knew 158 mts remained!

Nothing was planned for the evening. Nirav’s friend Jyoti had come down to Guwahati for some business meeting. So we decided to visit him. We reached his hotel and then we decided to go to a restaurant for some drinks and dinner.

Everything seemed picture perfect till then.

The problem cropped when I saw this other guy piling on with us three i.e. the colleague of Jyoti’s.

We went to a restaurant nearby and decided to sit in the open, A.C’s can get suffocating especially with people smoking and a poor ventilation. The guys ordered their drinks. I didn’t want any, but thought of sipping a chilled Fosters (… guess I had swam good today…so why not indulge?)….

The pile – on tried had impress to us. He began by this by boasting that he & Debojit (excuse me……. Debojit…… who?) were bum chums. He even called up someone – and then informed us that Debojit was currently in the U.S. of A doing shows.

As we three (Nirav, Jyoti & me) were immersed in our own talks, though the corner of my eye I could see this bastard speaking in a very low tone to someone over phone. I know eaves dropping is real baaaaaaaaaaaaaad! But then there is something called womanly instincts & shamelessly I was paying a closer attention to what he was narrating over phone. And I was horrified when I realized that my sixth sense was so damn right!
That motherfucker was discussing about me…..“………….. she is wearing a sleeveless top & jeans………………….. works in a tea company……………. Beer… beer…” and then looks at me and asks me loudly “Aapka beer finish ho gaya?”……….. “smoking……………”
Well... I knew I had to put the brakes and I did it so.
I cut him short by asking him “Excuse me… Hello!.. are you discussing about me?”… the guy was silent for a moment and denied.
I didn’t buy that as an answer and asked him “how does it bother him if I smoke … I drink… I wear jeans? If my husband is comfortable with me then who the hell is he? If he had a problem with my habits he should have told me right in the very beginning? And how would he fee if someone discussed about his wife like this?”… By that time this bastard was absolutely red on his face and he told to whomever he was talking that he will call back later.
He apologized me said “ I am sorry BABHI”…
Babhi?
Balls to guys like him!
For such chauvinist a woman is just a mere object to satisfy their own thirsts.
Nirav & Jyoti at first couldn’t decipher what was going on and when I set the accounts straight, this guy was so embarrassed that he didn’t know how to face Nirav!

Well I don’t know how many guys can I shut up but why do guys have a problem?

Why do they have such double standards?

Gosh!

Saturday, July 29, 2006

The Shillong Times!

Shillong has been a great escape always. I’ve regarded Shillong as my second home. Every summer right after the half yearly exams we would pack our bags (…Maa made sure I carry all my holiday home work too) and be away from the maddening heat of Guwahati.

Shillong Aita & Koka were not like my Aita & Koka at home. They were poles apart. The Shillong grand parents made sure I was doubly spoilt and never rebuked me nor encouraged Maa to do that!

Aita was a cuddly little thing! I loved to huddle & burrow close to her. She was an avid paan eater and the smell of the zarda is something that still reminds me of her.

The house in Shillong was quite similar to my house in Guwahati – the basics were similar – the big verandahs, the sitting area near the kitchen which was better to lounge around.

And the best thing about Shillong was perhaps walking on the wooden floor. How much I loved the reverberating sound that it made!

Next to it was the soft quilts. There could be no other place on earth better than Shillong to sleep…. that’s very me & my judgment.

Aita’s house was very nearby the Ward’s Lake. So taking long walks in the Lake, admiring the flowers in full bloom, feeding the fishes… (I still remember there was a big, fat, well sized fish and it was orange in colour.), relishing those noga tengas sprinkled with kola nimak was but natural!

Occasionally my mama would also take me on treks – not really treks but at that age it surely meant a hike to walk down to Golf Links.

And then there were the numerous rounds we did in Police Bazaar. Aita had some particulars shops – Radharani, Floury’s… there was this other old shop quite close to Radharani – I don’t recall the name now – Maa & me despised the very thought of going to that shop. But seemed Aita was quite friendly with everyone in that shop, so she would get all her stuff from that particular shop.

Besides these, Aita had one more favourite hang out zone. And it was the fish & veggie bazaar in the Jail Road! Now there again! Fish! I tagged along with her to this bazaar only because I loved watching those kongs cleaning & cutting the fish with such proficiency and fineness.

Well we also had rounds of social calls to make. Many a times I would invent a “me & my headache” and stay back chatting with Koka. Koka loved steamed corns with a little bit butter and he would prepare that soon after Aita & Maa would leave. We would chat for hours – Koka would tell me stories from books and his personal life and whatever he said was so interesting that I’ve treasured them so long. Or if Mama would be around we’d play ludo and how shamelessly Mama cheated!

Like Guwahati Aiat, even Shillong Aita had a whole bunch of Aitas who’d come for a game or two of cards – RUMMY?? Maa would be out with her friends at times and it was during those moments I’d take out my bald headed dolls.

But the same Shillong trips were different whenever Dity accompanied us. Many a times it has happened that he would take us to the bus terminus and then instead of dropping us there he would drive all the way to Shillong. But when he would be stuck up in Guwahati, he made it a point to join us later. And it would be always a surprise for me. I would be kept under dark about his plans!

With Dity around, I’d find myself in the billiards room of the Shillong club, or munching those lovely club sandwiches at the Golf club or maybe simply run around in the kitchen of Pine Wood!

And there would be the rides to the Elephant Falls, Shillong Peak or back track to Barapani for leisurely picnics.

Didn’t I love to gorge on those mutton singaras from EeeCee? And jalebis & chole bhature from Delhi Mistan. And perhaps buying shoes from Shillong has remained one constant in my life. The designs and shapes and the different heels can leave any shoe crazed mortal like me quite baffled!

If nothing else was there to keep me busy, there was Jimmy & Lama – the two dashing dare devils! Their loyalty could never be questioned as were their laziness! They looked massive and fearless – but it was just their looks. Besides that there wasn’t anything to be afraid of the duo and they made great pals too. They were the two hounds – the local breed of course!

Friday, July 28, 2006

The story begins from here…

I wasn’t able to comprehend why people were grief stricken and mourning. Koka rested in his bed, he was motionless and everyone paid their tributes by offering him flowers. Seeing this, I too ran outside and plucked a few flowers. I squirmed through the horde of people who made it quite impossible for me to go near the bed where Koka was resting with his eyes shut. I did manage to approach near Koka and like everyone else I too put the flowers on his body. Seeing this Aita went into hysteria and wept inconsolably. After some hours had passed and as the number of people augmented soon Koka was taken outside. I saw a Pandit chanting some verses and Dity was repeating those. I was more shocked to see Dity not in his usual attire but in dhoti and just sador. Things were happening too fast and too soon and no one seemed to have time for me to explain what was going on. Soon Koka was transferred to a sangi and he was carried away.

Everything happened in such a jiffy that I tried not to get too much into it. I thought once the people wouldleave us alone I’d ask Maa or Dity what actually was happening. But I never got a chance.
All that followed for the rest 15 days made me realize that Koka would never come back again. I could not see him nor talk to him ever. But why? No one had an answer to this.

Dity had shaved his head and the first time I saw him I gave a sharp cry! I didn’t like him this way. I wanted my Dity to be the way he was always – denim clad or in shorts or in kurta pajamas, not someone wearing dhotis and that too with his head shaved!

Soon the mourning days passed over. Things were back to normal –How much I missed my bed! (I had a bed to myself which Koka named it as “xoru khat”. It was basically a type of “charpoy”)

But something went terribly missing from our home. Something snapped. Something went wrong and all of a sudden happiness which was always around, now seemed to come in small packages.

But well, I had another set of Aita & Koka too…. So I knew at least there were people I could bank upon… and every summer I looked eagerly for my one month Shillong vacations….

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

...and then it happened one fine day...

Life for me was too good to be true. I had the perfect surroundings… the perfect parents, the perfect grand parents, the perfect home…. And I thought it would go on like this forever.

Koka’s health started deteriorating. I don’t know what ailments he had. But I noticed that he had lost his energy. He would not read voraciously as he used to, he would not get frenzied easily. Most of the time he would sit in the jaali kamra or the verandah. His friends still kept coming. But the chess board was nowhere to be seen. The bridge games were not played. Every time I asked, Maa and Aita would pacify me by saying he is “sick”. Now how sick was sick I failed to decipher at that time.

Koka didn’t like the idea of hospitals and hence there were doctors and nurses round the clock monitoring him. Maa suddenly coined this idea that the doctors who came on their shift wise visits were not only meant for Koka. Those doctors came to check on me too. So there was one doctor who’d make me have bitter syrups if I did not eat my food, then there was this other doctor who’d tell me he’d apply a syringe on me if I did not do my homework. And there was this other doctor too who would be after me to use the syringe as well make me have bitter syrups if I did not behave! These docs! They were no better than Maa & Aita I thought!

Things were getting monotonous and I was a trifle bored.There were so many people coming and going. They took all of Koka’s time. I missed snuggling close to him. I noticed that now he would be in his bed only. He did not come to the jaali kamra nor lounged in the verandah. Deep inside me I wished things would become nice and pleasant again.

It was 10th of August. I was getting ready for school. Soon Maa came in and I was shocked to see that she wasn’t ready as yet! Before I could start repeating the line which she tells me when I laze, she asked me to change my uniform. She also said I need not go to school. This left me bewildered. Maa telling me to wear something else than my uniform and also not to go to school! Such things rarely Maa said.

But how was I to know that I would never see Koka again?

And many things changed forever….

My first day in school!

Naah! I don’t recall that. But my early school days have been horrifying to everyone in my family as well as my neighbours!

Baby, my neighbour and I were in the same school. So either Baby’s dad or Dity would take turns to drop us to school.
Getting ready for school was always the busiest time for me & Maa. And making me eat something prior going to school was another big task at hands Maa had. Somehow after nibbling whatever was served (was mostly bread & eggs – coz these two were something I ate without much mess), it was time for me to go to school, leaving Aita, Koka, my dolls, my treasure hunts in the cupboard of the living room. As Dity would switch on the ignition my “nakhras” would start. First I would hesitate to sit in the car and then as Koka & Aita would bid me adieu, I feel bad to leave them alone. After baby would hop in the car it would be my turn. Never was this so easy. I would start with a whimper and this would accelerate soon to state where I would yell that I would not go to school. And if you are wondering what followed with my shrills & cries, you are not wrong if you are remembering the spanks!

But things were not like this from the first day. I really don’t recall my first day. But I knew what a school was like because Maa at times would take me to her school. And hence that is where the problem was. I had a feeling that Maa would be by my side when I go to school. But little did I realize that my school and Maa’s school was different. That Maa would not be with me. This became so harrowing for me that the very thought of going to school made me coil inside my shell!

My class Nursery teacher was Miss Lobo. She has been my favourite teacher till date. Last I met her was some two years back while walking down through Dighalipukhuri. Miss Lobo was so much Maa like. Not look wise, but resembling Maa (be it mine or any others, because all the girls felt Miss Lobo was like their Maas too) because she was lovable, she was caring and at the same time like Maa she took proper care to see whether we ate our lunch.

I don’t know how a year passed and soon from Nursery I was in class KG. My cries and “nakhras” of not going to school also lessened in a year. Now we had Miss Molly as our class teacher. But I missed Miss Lobo lots! So many a times I would be in Class Nursery instead of Class KG!

The one friend who’d still in touch with me since those KG days is Manashi….
…but that’s again another chapter for some other time…………

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Bald headed dolls & assortment of misadventures!

My monkey-ing around just didn’t end in mixing sugar with the chilly pickle! One incident I vividly recall is - I would be left enthralled every time the pressure cooker would go buzz! The steamy fog that swirled along would leave me perplexed. Perhaps one of my fetishes at that time was to try catching the vapour as the whistle blew off the pressure cooker. And so it happened one fine day, that having heard enough of my rants and agonies, Aita lifted me up and said she’ll let me touch the pressure cooker! I was so very happy for a fraction of a second. I felt my prayers were finally answered! It’s only after Aita kept her word and made me touch the wretched pressure cooker that I learnt the first practical lesson of my life – “EVERYTHING THAT GLITTERS IS NOT GOLD”!

It took me three hours on average to finish off my lunch everyday. I would sit for lunch at twelve noon sharp and would be still there biting my food for the next three hours! How bad an eater I was…and even now after all these years I still am! So Aita, Maa or whoever would come to the kitchen to make the afternoon tea would still find me nibbling my food!

Fish is one stuff that has been in my “Things I don’t like” list ever since I can recall. I ate fish either because it had been accompanied by spanks, reprimand, force… and what not!
I finally found an answer to this one day when Bulee (our cat) was purring near me. I bent down and dropped a few morsel of my food and the smart cat gladly ate it. So this did it. From then on, if I was served fish I’d take it without any ranting! And it became routine for Bulee too. She now knew my timings and like an obedient disciple would come under my chair the moment I sat down to eat! This adventure of mine continued for quite sometime. But Maa was not convinced that I took to eating fish. Soon my tactics were unveiled and from that day onwards I wasn’t served fish no matter what! And Bulee too was not very happy to eat the pain “dal & rice” minus the large chunk of fish!
Like fish, the glass of milk has trickled through the kitchen sink and then streaming through the drain instead of going down my esophagus! And even this mischief of mine was exposed one day much to my disappointment. Dity was in the backyard and I don’t know for what reasons. As usual it was my “milk time” and I was in the dining hall alone with the glass of miserable milk staring at me. And straight I went towards the sink and with one skilled maneuver the glass was emptied. I opened the tap to wash away any blob of milk remaining in the sink. Little did I realize that Dity would be just across in the backyard and I was caught red handed of my naughtiness!
So it was flavoured milk that soon followed – be it Bournvita, Chocolate powder, Coffee… but nothing could make me gulp milk….
Finally it was decided that I should not be forced to eat fish and drink milk.
But my folks were staggered out of their wits when they realized that I loved fish bakes and pies, fish fingers (& yea…the tarter sauce!)… And I also loved gorging on “doi and payox”!
So fish in the shape of fish and milk in the form of milk was not appetizing as it was when otherwise.
I had an array of dolls. I loved mothering them. My dolls were my punching bags if truth be told. I used to scold, spank, cuddle, bathe, force them eat fish and gulp milk like the way Maa did to me everyday!

One amazing thing about my dolls was they were all bald! Little did I know that unlike us their tresses would not grow long! I tried different hair styles on my dolls. I went on chopping off their locks and remotely they all looked repulsive after the magic make over I always did!

Nevertheless they were all mine!

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Sibling Rivalry

Growing up with cousins is great fun…eerr… if the catastrophes are to be kept under wraps. We as cousins were very close. We were friends first and cousins later. Niki, Vicky, Abhimanyu, Annu & me – made quite a team. We didn’t require other friends those days. We would meet so often, basically everyone would camp at ours. Aita was the baby siter. Niki was the eldest, followed by Vicky and then Abhi a year younger, then it was me two years younger and finally it was Annu another two years below me. Now, Annu had to be included in each and every game of our or else she would never let live anyone else in peace! So though Annu was basically included in all our games, most of the time she was left to the bits and pieces only!

It was the vacation time we enjoyed the most. Vacations meant a lot of fun. Our time table went something like this –
We would wake up in the morning by seven. We were served milk and because I was averse to drinking it, I’d always pour it in Niki’s or Abhi’s glass! Then it was our study time. The only one hitch we had was Maa’s vacation coincided with ours. So we five would be in the dining area where Aita & Maa would make us do our holiday homework, give us surprise test and dictations! This followed up-till breakfast. Soon after breakfast we were left to our own devises. It was one moment we always waited enthusiastically. Evenings Dity would take the five of us for drives. That was another high point of our other wise “mundane” lives!

Around this time of our vacation there would be one more cousins of ours who’d come to join us and we were usually reluctant to make her a part of our gang! Nirmali! She was the “apple” of Aita’s eyes! She stood always first in class, she was never monstrous like us, she would look too much immature for her age (she was same age as Vicky)…and for us she was too damn sweet. But nevertheless she was a part of us. But what we hated about her was no matter how much she would be a partner in our crimes she always got a fair deal! The reason because she always “stood first in class”! Many a times we have done things to make her life hell!

It was Abhi and me together who took the first puff! We asked Annu to steal a cig from Dity’s pack. Annu instead of just one cig marrowed the entire packet! She thought we might ask her repeatedly and so she stole the entire pack and would give us one after another as and when we ask!

I recall those times of our lives with so much fondness; it’s not easy to put across. Our dosage of fun was pure and undiluted. We didn’t have distractions like video games, play stations, mobile phones and also the television didn’t have so much to offer either!

I am talking about the early eighties – been a long long time!

Who’s where –
Majoni ba is a doc – residing in Boston – married & has a kid too
Vicky – shuttles between US & New Delhi often- got married recently.
Abhi is in Merchant Navy - nine months on the ship & 3 months home... married & has a one month old daughter now.
Annu is a physiotherapist – now in London – would prefer a live-in than a marriage.
Nirmali is in Dubai – she’s a doc too… & she’s still the same…., is married with a kid.
Niki is in Guwahati & we are at logger heads!

Monkey Business!

I was a wild child as far as I recall. And Koka & Dity left nothing unturned to spoil me even more. Both were of the opinion that raising a child should be with utmost love and care and not with the cane! Aita & Maa too agreed with it. But at the rate of my mischief it was the cane Maa always took as the final recourse!

Maa was a teacher. So I was left with Aita & Koka the whole day. I would snuggle up to Koka when he’d be reading the Reader’s Digest and keep asking one thing or the other and the old man would patiently reply to all my queries. I also would take magnets – I don’t know why he took magnets below his ear lobes… on his knees and palms but I love the magnets. Since I was not allowed to play with those I settled humbly by taking a therapy like Koka!

But Aita would not be like this. At times she would run out of patience and then she’d threaten me to either “behave” or “spank”! But she never did spank me once. She’d keep a track of all my mischief and when Maa would return home Aita would tell her all about my misdeeds!

My mischiefs were wide and varied. Sometimes I’d mix turmeric powder with the tea leaves – since the tea leaves looked so black I thought yellow would do some good! I’d sneak out of the house and run around in the compound when actually Aita would force me to sleep. Many a times I have fallen in dirty drains and Srikant would lift me up out of sheer disgust from there!

Maa would listen to all this and then would look at me sternly. She didn’t have to ask anything. Her looks frightened me enough for me to confess that “I DID”!

Maa, I knew would get mad listening to all my misadventures. At times she’d leave me with a warning or two and at times things would be worse. I would listen to her with my head bowed down. When she would be finished, I would get out of the room, run hurriedly through the corridor and look around for Koka. Wherever he would be, I’d rush to him and when asked “ki hol majoni?” … well … it’s the point when hell freezes over! My cry would be more than a cry… ! I’d explain him my sorry state and how Maa & Aita team up always to make my life miserable! Koka would cajole me and make me sit on his lap and then call Maa and lecture her about how much wrong she did! When Maa tried explaining about my monkey business he’d never buy a word of it!

Maa & Aita were quite at loss! After a lot of introspection and brooding over, Aita came up with this grand idea that I should be spanked only once a week i.e every Saturday! Since Maa had Saturdays off, she could make up for all the spanks which was due on me for the rest of the week too!

Aita somehow managed to get a thin and sleek cane for this purpose. And well! I was not the only one. I realized that she made two more similar slender canes. One would be sent to my youngest jethai, Ruby who stayed in the Air Force station near airport for Abhi & Annu and the other was sent to Purobi jethai meant for Niki & Vicky!

We were all little monsters! When we got together the whole house would turn into a boxing dome! Besides the five of us we had two more cousins. One was Majoni baa, who’s very senior than us, so she was never game with our ploys… and we were okay with this arrangement coz she was so nice to us monsters!

And there she was – we five hated her all the more when we realized that Aita had never sent a cane for her!

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

It used to be my playground!

My earliest recollections go back to the days when everything seemed fun, joyous and blissful minus the pain. Everything around me appeared dazzling. And I enjoyed every moment of it.

Ours was a big house. It was an Assam type house, with the touch of aristocracy. The verandahs were big enough for me to roller skate. The corridors seemed like tunnels. My favourite zone was the living space which ran parallel to the drawing room and was separated by a wall with a glass door which I used as a canvas and muddled it with crayons! And adjacent to it was the huge kitchen cum dining area. This living space was a make shift kind of room transformed form a verandah. In one corner was the strong wooden table kept permanently to iron clothes. Next to it was an old cupboard where there were numerous books, my Dity’s sports trophies, old magazines and all the junk which was my favourite treasure hunt.

This was perhaps the most lived in space of the entire house. Everyone who came would walk through the long corridors passing through the bedrooms and would automatically take the left turn to reach this living room. The old arm chairs, the cane sofa with its lopsided cushions were more comfortable than sitting in the drawing room. The living room would be full of people. Either there were Koka’s friends – Khela Koka (Koka chess partner)… the group of another two stylish Aitas & one Koka who’d come everyday except for Thursdays and Saturdays for a game of bridge in the late afternoons. Or there would be the innumerable friends of Maa and Dity lounging there… or there would be Aita’s gang of Aitas – either gossiping or exchanging recipes or better sometimes Hemi (the girl who baby sat me) eavesdropping all this and much more all the while ironing clothes!

This sit up area was more so like a jaali –kamra. It had windows with netted frames all over. The jaali karma didn’t have a ceiling fan. The thought never came to anyone while converting the verandah to a room. And being fixed with netted window frames the room was quite breezy all throughout. My favourite besides the junk filled cupboard was sitting on the stair of the door which led further to the kitchen garden. Aita was an avid gardener. We grew everything at this kitchen garden with a few exceptions like salt, oil and rice! I loved sitting on this stair and gazing to the vegetable garden. I loved to see the greenery and the different shapes and sizes of the vegetables.

Srikant was Aita’s Man-Friday. He would look after the veggies in the backyard and flowers in the front yard, mow the lawn, trim the hedges with utmost care and diligence. And it was watering the plants which gave me some sort of joy. Srikant would never let me water the plants. He treated the plants like his own kids, what if I poured more than the required amount? But I loved watering plants. So everyday it took quite a dose of emotional blackmailing for Srikant to finally give me the hose-pipe!

Every winter Srikant would make a bed for me too and would ask me to plants peas, carrots, tomatoes and cabbage. That would be my guarded zone and I hated anyone messing up with those!

I grew up amidst these simpler things of life. Yet everyday was never monotony. TV was unheard of. I vividly remember listening to the All India Radio every afternoon, when Aita & I would have our afternoon siesta. On very hot days we would lay a straw mat in the corridor, put the radio just above our heads. Aita would snooze within minutes but sleep never was easy to me. My mind wandered about in the gardens, to run after the butterflies, to poke around the cauliflowers, to pluck a few bogories or go and explore that cupboard again!


Saturday, July 01, 2006

Day One

February 7th 1976. I was born precisely at 8.50 a.m. My birth has been significant to my immediate folks in one way or the other. Their personal experiences and stories gyrating at the time of my birth has been repeated time and again, so much so I can actually see how things could have been, how things were...

I was born premature. Nobody expected me to arrive on the 7th of Feb. Not even Maa in whose womb I was sheltered from the outside world. Aita & Koka were to catch the Indian Airlines flight to Calcutta on that day. The flight was early in the morning. It was Koka's usual check up time. So on the 6th evening they were having a quite close family time. Aita giving Maa handy hints how to take care of herslef when Aita would be not around. Aita also warned Maa to keep a check on Dity and his late nights.

Dity being the only son was a thorough spoilt brat. Koka loved him a lot. Anyways he would, but as far as I felt, the love which Koka had for his son was more than usual. Dity was Koka's expectaion, his anticipation... Dity was the one Koka thought would paint his unfinished canvas.

It was in the wee hours of the 7th morning that Maa went into labour and she had to be rushed to the Hospital immediately. Aita and Koka immediately cancelled their trip and instead went to the Hospital in Panbazar. Purobi jethai and Mukti Bhindeo jethpaha, both being Gynecologist rushed to the hospital soon. (Guwahati at that time had only one hospital). Maa was rushed inside the operation/labour room.... conditions were deteriorating with Maa. Purobi jethai came out and told Dity that. She also added with caution, "Its either the mother or the baby we can save". I don't what was Dity's expression during that moment. But being his daughter I am sure for a moment or two he was left frozen. Dity actually had asked Purobi jethai to save Maa. And I have no qualms about it now!

But then as the old axiom goes - All that's well, ends well.... All's well that ends well... whatever... it be... Maa was out of danger and even I was able to make it to this world....

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Happy Birthday...

Happy 54th Birthday!
Sorry! For being so honest about it. I know you'll hate it but then let me assure you by saying this-
No! You don't look like a 54 year old!!! Not at least to me. You are still the one I met long long ago. Slim...pretty...always smiling... caring... loving...tender & petite! Someone who always smelt so refreshing. Someone I knew was the best and truely unmatched. You're still the one & you're still the same. You will always be so.
But you know what?
I don't have a gift for you today.
Not that because I am broke :(...
not that I couldn't find the exact pair of stilletoes you wanted...
not that I couldn't find your favourite blue chiffon saree...
but because I haven't been doing so for the last ten years....I still have the card which I gave you on this very day ten years back. You saw the card, but didn't read it though. I don't blame you. There's no reason for me to be angry . I knew it. But you sure liked what you saw...right? So that card still remains inside my closet... I had a look today early in the morning.... smiled at myself... wished you and the card back went to its secure zone again, only to be opened this very day the next year.
Just would like to tell you that I love you lots and you'll be mine forever & for always. And I know you will be by my side in my darkest hours... you will be my strength... you pacify me when I am tired and you'll be there to remind me always that this is not the end of the road...
And..... No! I don't miss you at all.
For me you still exist. Your presence is in me. Its you who made me what I am today.

Happy 54th Birthday Maa!

The incorrigible inference & womanly instincts!

I met Simi after what seemed ages. I faintly recall seeing her & Gaurav two years ago right after they got married on one cold December evening near Gauhati Commerce College. Gaurav got down to buy fags & so was Nirav's mission. I have seen Nirav & his bunch of lads buying fags from this particular shop for the last few years. So this guy who owns the shop knows all about his loyal customers - by their names... families... address... & he is a messenger to these guys too at times...
But then here I was talking about Simi in the first place.
It was Janti's birthday and the whole gang got together after a long time. I was happy to see Simi. She looked the same like the last time I saw her infront of that ciggy shop near Gauhati Commerce College. We exchanged pleasantries and started off with the usual female talks... the hubby cribs... the ongoing world-cup & the fight for the TV remote and what not!
Simi & Gaurav stays quite nearby to ours. So naturally both of us were vying to make that grand statement "PLEASE DO DROP IN AT OUR PLACE SOMETIME"!
It was Simi who did away with that statement & I said OK we should definitely make it sometime. One thing led to other & we got on to exchanging cell numbers... She told me hers & I stored it. To make things easy for her I called her number and within a minute or so the screen of her cell phone flashed with my name!
MY NAME? I was suddenly filled with guilt! I thought how mean I was all this time...how rude of me to have not stored her phone number… inspite of being in the same circle... I delved... I rummaged... and yet I could find no answer to this hostility of my attitude I felt I had....
I looked to Simi and for a fraction of a moment I felt something was terribly wrong. Simi's expression was joyous & blissful like "never before"! A thousand and one thoughts ran across my mind but I could never exactly assimilate why was she smiling more than she should have had and why her face suddenly showed as if a heavy saddle was off her shoulders....
I knew I would not be able to make the guess nor was I in a mood to play a James Bond! So without wasting much time I gave her a questioning look....
All I could hear was Simi telling me over and over again "Oh! so its you.... its only you... Gosh! Its only you....." Her words seemed to reverberate!
I smiled back feeling silly and slightly awkward too! I knew where the hitch was! And I wondered how could she live with a burden so insignificant and yet as annoying as seeing a woman’s name on her hubby’s cell phone. And she didn’t dare to actually sort out with Gaurav about it!
…. She looked at me trying to calm her nerves and said, “…. Until now I had some outrageous ideas….how terribly stupid on my part…..”
The cell phone was Gaurav’s before it became hers. So Gaurav had my number stored too – my number was just a sort of S.O.S –“… just in case….he had to leave a message for Nirav…”
As Simi & Gaurav were about to leave I wish her “Good-Night” and believe me… she actually would sleep proper & good from now on!